Why Boundaries Are Essential in Your Relationship
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Why Boundaries Are Essential in Your Relationship

Boundaries are necessary in relationships. We all have them, even if we are unaware of them until they are crossed and we are upset. Establishing boundaries and discussing them with your partner or spouse can make life, and ultimately your relationship, much happier. Ignore boundaries, and you are likely to find them a problem.

If boundaries are not established in your relationship it runs the risk of becoming fraught with disagreements and arguments. If you and your partner are unaware of what you expect from each other, and where your personal boundaries lie, you will find it hard to make your relationship work, especially if you have opposing ideas you never discuss.

What boundaries are

A boundary is where you draw the line in your relationship. Just like a physical boundary such as a wall that separates two properties, a boundary in your relationship can separate what you need and expect from what you do not want or expect to occur.

For example, one boundary may be that you expect fidelity from your partner. If they should stray across the boundary and cheat on you, it is likely that you will not accept this behavior as being okay.

Another boundary might be that you expect your partner to support you in all ways possible, including attending family gatherings and standing-up for you in public. If they refuse to engage in family activities, or disagree with you over an important issue in front of other people, you may get upset.

Why boundaries are important

Setting boundaries and making them clear is essential if you want to have an easier relationship. It can be hard to please a partner, and be pleased, if neither of you understands each other’s expectations and needs. Discuss your boundaries, and at least you will be aware and not have a misunderstanding.

Why having similar boundaries helps a relationship

If you expect your partner to be faithful to you, but they do not have a boundary in this area, you are bound to come to emotional blows. Likewise, if you expect your partner to behave a certain way in other respects, but they have different boundaries, they probably will not behave as you want them to, and you will be upset and feel let down.

How to establish boundaries

It does not matter if you are beginning a new relationship, or are already deeply into one. Now is a great time to establish what your boundaries are, see where they overlap, and talk about differences regarding expectations. Finding a middle ground can help ease tension and communication if you disagree, but having completely different boundaries entirely and not trying to establish how to deal with this will not be useful.

Relationship boundaries can help make or break a union. Partners who do not agree on important issues, and overstep boundaries are not happy and fulfilled. You can give your relationship a boost by discussing the boundaries you have with your partner, and looking at theirs. You can also help new relationships along by establishing boundaries early on so that you both know what is expected of you.

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